How to feel better about yourself – love yourself now

How to feel better about yourself – love yourself now

How do you feel about yourself at the moment?

If you’re a bit low and generally feeling a bit bleugh, you’re not alone. Months of Lockdown combined with comfort eating/ drinking = feeling a bit crappy and unhappy with how you look and feel. It’s not a good combo. 

And I completely get it. Following my miscarriage last year, I found it hard to get straight back on it and I gave myself permission to take it easy for a while. The result is I have a bit of a tummy that’s proving hard to shift.

FYI – Tummy fat is notoriously stubborn and the area that takes longest to go (female hormones to blame). Things like anxiety and stress cause your body to hold onto the fat around the tummy area. Annoying but true. It WILL go but it does take time…but that’s a post for another day! 

Back to the point of today…

Giving yourself a hard time and focusing on all the bits you don’t like doesn’t help. It won’t make it magically go away and all it does is make you feel more self conscious. 

In the UK the advantage of Lockdown in winter is that you can hide away. You aren’t seeing many people and when you do you’re all wrapped up in several layers of clothing and a mask! 

And actually that makes now the perfect time to fall back in love with your body. Then when lockdown ends and summer rolls around your confidence will be at an all time high. 

How to feel better about yourself: 


Whatever shape or size you are, your body has got you to this point in your life. It’s coped with everything you’ve thrown at it. It might have seen you through pregnancies, births, miscarriages, illnesses, accidents, marriage, divorce, ups and downs…and it’s still going strong. Your body is amazingly resilient. 

Take a moment to feel thankful for everything your body has been through over the years. It deserves love and looking after. Not negativity and shame. 

When I’m pushing myself in a HIIT class or running, I feel so strong. I love feeling fit and I love feeling that everything I’m doing now is protecting my body for years to come. I want to be fit and active as I get older. I’m not loving the way my tummy looks at the moment but that pales into insignificance when I consider what I’ve been through in the last year and how proud I am that I’ve coped. 

2. Let go of the past

I think a lot of body confidence comes from what’s instilled in you as you grow up.

My mum, in particular, has always been my role model. She’s in her late 60’s now and still super fit. She runs every other day and in between times does my bootcamp sessions. We compete on our Fitbit step challenge and she regularly thrashes me. She has a healthy approach to food – she loves puddings and chocolate but most of what she eats is really healthy. She’s just very balanced and happy in her own skin. And this has helped me be the same. I’ve always been that person who happily walks around the changing room naked!!!!

You can’t control what influences you had when you were growing up. Not everyone is as lucky as me and if you saw your mum or someone close going through diet after diet or constantly being self critical, chances are you will be the same. It’s not your fault but it will be holding you back now. 

Take some time to reflect and decide now to create a new internal monologue that shifts away from negativity and towards love and acceptance. Focus on what your body can do rather than what it looks like. 

And this is also a really important point if you have kids or any other children/ teenagers who look up to you. You’re a role model and children will subconsciously pick up on your actions and mirror what you do. Be a positive influence and instil body confidence in them. Make them proud of who they are. 

3. Get comfortable with how you look now

Stand in front of the mirror naked or with underwear on and instead of zooming in on all the parts you aren’t happy with and want to change, only look at what you like. Really notice it all and be thankful. Eg. I love how thick and shiny my hair is, how clear my skin is and how strong my legs are, etc. 

I know that some of you will be thinking that there’s very little you like at the moment…STOP.

You are you. You need to learn to love who you are.

If think you’ll magically love yourself when you are the ‘perfect’ weight or size, you will only be disappointed because that moment will never come. You’ll always find something else to obsess over and be critical of. Decide from this point forwards you LOVE yourself – imperfections and all. 

Don’t hide away from mirrors. Look at yourself and celebrate what you look and feel like. 

4. No one is looking at you

Very true now with lockdown and winter but true all the time. You might feel like everyone is looking at you and judging you but actually we’re all pretty self obsessed and much more likely to be thinking about ourselves! 

I haven’t been wearing a bikini recently because I’ve felt self conscious. And then this weekend, I decided enough was enough. I put my bikini back on and didn’t care. No one gave me a second glance and looking around I saw that everyone was different shapes and sizes and it didn’t matter. I played with James and forgot to worry about what I looked like. It’s liberating to let go and just do it. 

If you’ve been holding off wearing a dress or shorts (obviously not now but in summer) because you don’t feel in shape yet, just do it anyway. Embrace how you look now and go with it. No more putting life on hold. No one is looking anyway! 

5. Go forth with confidence and a smile

When you look at yourself you look down…it’s not a flattering angle – you will notice how your tummy sticks out or boobs look saggy.

No one else shares this view! Everyone you meet looks straight at you and takes in you as a whole. They genuinely don’t notice if your tummy is a little jiggly or if your thighs are bigger than you like! 

What people DO notice though is how you smile, whether you make eye contact and how warm and welcoming you are. Stand straight, be confident and friendly. That will make far more of a lasting impression than what you look like.

Admittedly, you aren’t getting much practice at meeting people at the moment but do it to yourself in the mirror. Smile with shoulders back and see what difference it makes. 

6. Make an effort

It’s tempted to spend lockdown in pj’s and dressing gown. No one is going to see you after all. BUT making a little effort will make such a difference to how you feel. 

So paint those nails, do your hair, pop on some make up. And do it for YOU. 

If you enjoyed this post make sure you sign up to my FREE ‘FEEL FAB IN FEB’ CHALLENGE:

It’s not too late to sign up. Each day you’ll get a motivating email (a little like this post) alongside a quick workout to do during the day. Nothing overwhelming just designed to help you cope with another month in Lockdown. You’re not alone! Just click on button below and get signed up ASAP 🙂